Question: Dear Hope+Wellth I’m losing my confidence and I think it correlates to my style or lack thereof. I’m a 40 something single mom with work and kids, so it’s just not something I think about very often anymore. I want to get back to that. How do I find what my personal style is now?
Answer: Hi, I’m Arlinda, a style advisor for MoodWellth and I love questions like these. Let me start by saying that I am also a 40 something (48 to be exact) mom. I work, have a family and have all of these other hats that I wear that many of us moms always have. Sometimes it’s a lot more than we ask for, right, but we do find the strength, the courage, the time and the dedication to get things done…just like style. If you want to feel better about your outside appearance, you have to put a little love into it. Sometimes, we feel really good on the inside, but it’s not translating on the outside and that’s where style becomes more than just clothes—it becomes a form of self-expression and self-care. What we choose to wear can significantly impact how we feel about ourselves, lifting our spirits or making us feel more confident when we need it most. As we age in a society that often overlooks or undervalues the beauty of growing older, it can feel like a constant battle to maintain self-worth and positivity. Embracing our personal style, no matter our age, becomes a powerful way to reclaim our narrative, resist societal pressures, and protect our mental health. Feeling good on the outside isn’t about conforming to trends; it’s about celebrating who we are, where we’ve been, and where we’re going.
So, to answer your question, “how do I find out what my personal style is now?” Intention. You had style before, but maybe it looked different, or maybe it was shaped by different circumstances. Now, it’s about being intentional in how you choose to present yourself to the world. It’s about taking stock of where you are in life, acknowledging how your tastes or needs might have evolved, and understanding that style isn’t static. Just like you, it grows, changes and adapts with each season of life. The goal is to align your outer appearance with your inner essence, allowing both to shine through in harmony.
Finding your personal style as you age isn’t about trying to keep up with what’s new or what others think you should wear. It’s about reflecting on what makes you feel most like yourself—confident, comfortable and authentic. Think about the pieces in your wardrobe that bring you joy and consider why they do. Is it the way they fit, the color, the texture or how they make you feel powerful or serene? Start there and let that guide you in creating a wardrobe that celebrates your unique journey.
Here are a few tips to help you rediscover and refine your personal style:
Reflect on Your Lifestyle
Consider how your daily life looks now versus in the past. Your wardrobe should be a reflection of your current routines, activities, and aspirations, not just what’s been hanging in your closet for years.
Experiment and Evolve
Don’t be afraid to try new things, even if they seem outside your comfort zone. Your style should evolve as you do. Experiment with colors, textures and silhouettes that feel fresh and exciting to you.
Focus on Fit and Comfort
Your body may have changed, and that’s okay. Find clothes that make you feel good in your skin, not just trendy pieces that don’t serve you. Prioritize quality over quantity and choose items that enhance your natural shape and make you feel at ease.
Embrace Timeless Pieces
Invest in a few key pieces that are classic and versatile. These become the foundation of your wardrobe, making it easy to mix and match with newer, trendier items that still resonate with your evolving style.
Stay True to Yourself
Style is deeply personal. Don’t feel pressured to dress a certain way because of societal expectations or age norms. Be bold in expressing who you are today, and let your style tell your unique story.
