The statistics have always lingered in my mind: one in eight. That’s how many women in America will be diagnosed with breast cancer in their lifetime. My mother, Requitta, was one of them—the one in eight. I don’t remember much about her journey with the disease. I was only around four or five when she was diagnosed.
As a young woman in my 20’s, I struggled each day with who I was. I didn’t know my purpose because I was still learning my strengths and weaknesses, and most of all, just who Judy really was. Mistakes from my teenage years followed me into my 30’s where I still wasn’t sure why God put me on this earth. I didn’t go to college, so I was seeking to develop viable skills. I got my real estate license and “flipped” houses.
When I first opened the doors of Joy Life Counseling in December 2019, I had no idea that only a few months later, the world would change. Like many, I entered that new year with hope, expectation and vision. I had taken a huge leap of faith. I was a new business owner. I was building something that, for me, felt sacred—a space where healing could happen for people who looked like me. A space I didn’t often see growing up.
Then came the pandemic.
“Turn your pain into purpose” is a statement I had heard used many times over the years, especially in relation to navigating life after it had been disrupted by a riveting experience. While I had faced and triumphed through a great many challenges during my lifetime, nothing prepared me for the one that was waiting in the balance. I had never truly considered the magnitude of what turning pain into purpose could feel like—or the agony of the process—until it happened to me
I am a licensed therapist and my motivation for this career path came from being the child of a mother who struggled with mental illness until her untimely death when I was exactly one week away from my 17th birthday. This event, along with other traumatic ones, influenced what I call a “sad spark” within myself.
To me, living a life of confidence without compromise means unapologetically embracing my identity, values and vision, no matter the circumstances. As a BIPOC woman, I’ve learned that confidence is not about perfection but about showing up authentically, even when the world tells you to shrink.
